New York, New York The Bloggings of a Native New Yorker An Uninteresting Bit of Fun

  • An Uninteresting Bit of Fun

    Alright, so first blog of ever and I’m all psyched and ready to go. Let’s give you a little insight on the NativeNewYorker’s life shall we?

    So my recent boss Mr. Cock (yes, that is his name) has given me about 2 weeks to write 15 columns for The Newspaper. I don’t think he understands that fucking creativity doesn’t jump out of a fucking magicians hat along with a rabbit. I mean, come on. It takes me at least a day and a half to really complete one of my articles and thats when I’ve had a couple days to even come up with something good enough for The Newspaper. When you live in New York, writing about rape, drug busts, fashion, the bohemian lifestyle, going green, all that, just doesn’t quite cut it because quite honestly, we hear about all the shit every day. So you’ve gotta be that one person who can think outside of the box and come up with something that about 12 million people haven’t read yet.

    My 3 best friends: Dally, Jasmine and Lucy are all swamped with work too. We’re meeting at Milo’s (my favourite restaurant) for drinks on friday night and we’ll finally be able to talk about Jasmine’s jerk of a boyfriend who she saw meeting up with another woman last night. She’s probably in the middle of a full blown freaking war with him because I must say, she’s pretty intense and very, VERY opinionated. He’ll be gone in about 3, 2, 1… bye bye jerk boyfriend.

    Lucky for me i’m technically still single, other than a few dates here and there… my girlfriends question me about my need to be single as if I’m some 20-something chick getting ready for her next clubbing fiasco, but I seriously just don’t mind being a lone ranger.
    I have a date with “Todd McYummy” tomorrow night which I’m looking forward to for 3 reasons: He’s refreshingly polite, he can cook, and he’s smokin. I mean, he’s HOT. He works for The Newspaper also and I’ve been getting a few flirtatious looks and comments from him for the past few weeks. Unfortunately I’ve been so caught up in work that dating didn’t really occur to me until he pulled me to the side just as I was leaving the office and asked me to dinner. So, great, dinner with the 30-year-old equivalent of my 9th grade crush Dan Peterson.

    —–> Dally just called, she was at a bar with some of her work friends and got asked out by the 21-year-old equivalent of the young, hot, Tom Cruise in “Top Gun”. Dally’s not usually one for younger guys, whom she got over after cougarism became intensely taboo, but she’s seemed pretty into him when she described his already-viewed package. According to her, they got into the bathroom and had hardcore, college-type sex in between some fabulous oral and getting slightly hammered. Sounds like some good old fashioned fun for my 31 year old buddy. Go Dally Go!

    I should probably be getting down to work- my creativity has not yet been inspired… Dally suggests going solo for a few minutes… always revvs her up before work? She’s so sick. Love her to death.

    But really, when does this hard-core, college sex get to be a little too young for a 30-something?

3 Comments to An Uninteresting Bit of Fun

  • Look into writing some articles on science.

  • I don’t think you’re too old for the “hard-core college sex” until you find yourself out of breath and needing to take a break part-way through…if you’re not there yet, I say keep enjoying it!

  • Everyone is different. I never went that route … perhaps too idealistic and then college and post college … and post post college and beyond years were too demanding of my time. Quickies and short relationships didn’t and don’t seem — to me — to be worth the time at all. Better to spend that time listening to yourself. Then be patient and find the right partner.

Louis Sheehan

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Louis Sheehan
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